The Dangers of not Learning Dutch

Not knowing a language can be dangerous. Sometimes the simplest of things can be dangerous. Once my face was a bit stingy after I had just shaved and I had heard moisturiser cools down the sensation. So I had a look for some in the bathroom cabinet … Now in MY section – some old razors and soap – HER section … A whole wall full of various sizes of bottles of every creed and kind, the only thing was…

face cream
Some wanker putting fucking cream on his face

everything was in Dutch. All I knew was that moisturiser probably comes in a blue bottle…This was a wall of Blue bottles…  so I ingeniously decided to read the ingredients to decipher which one was moisturiser ..  one said “aloe vera” I thought, ‘that’s soothing right ?’ … put it on my face … and that was the day I learned that VEET is a Hair Removal Cream !! ….   NOT a moisturiser … Smelly at first – but refreshingly smooth to the touch . I didn’t have to shave for a good while after that .